Friday, 17 February 2017

(7)

Works are okay but not that fine. I'm in rush and most of the time, I'm scared. I did ask few foolish question which I regretted then. I show my clumsiness & flaws already.

I'm happy to start everything over, Aluq and Imran is just very nice & AWESOME. They're busy people but they're really helpful. Although Imran is reaaaaaaaaaaally busy these days, I feel bad for burdening him all the time. But it just nice to have him around. Because he's a nice person & make people feel safe since he is #MRKNOWITALL haha. I wonder how amazing their life is. Eh, did busy people have conflict with their hearts and feeling? Because I don't think so :). Everyone in the team are just too good to be with.

& mira is simply happy yahuu!

Wednesday, 15 February 2017

(6)

I've promised myself to get busy all the time, get tired all the time. So that I won't have enough time to think about you, and I almost do. My life are doing great at this moment, I'm happy to hang around with new friends. I'm sure to love myself good enough, I love my own nature character although you don't like it.

                & I hope you too.

Friday, 10 February 2017

(5)

I had an amazing evening. Thanks to someone.

I'm so excited bila awak ajak keluar. I'm so happy sampai rasa macam nak menangis. Because I thought I will never see you again. I'm quite nervous walking through the stairs. I somehow forgot your face, your scent, your smile. I'm flustered to see you again. Still handsome & tall, I might fall for you again if I had the chance to repeat everything from the start.

I'm so happy but then I know it gonna end soon. Very soon. So I take care of my heart a lot today. I avoid looking into your eyes, less talk, less smile. I controlled myself.

I wish the meeting was much longer so we could just sit together and enjoy the company. I wish to see you again tonight, tomorrow & everyday. I wish we could go for grocery shopping, explore foods around JB; just like how we used to do.

But I know, things are not the same anymore.

It's my greed. I want you more. I want to see you more. I want to smile more in front of you. I always wanted more second for us to be together. A year is not enough because I miss you so bad. I'm happy to see your car. I wished we don't broke up. But it just a mindless wish.

I'm greedy person. That's why you leave me. I know.
Honestly, I wished the time would stop when we were together.

Thank you awaaaaaaak.

I wish you happiness, forever.

Sunday, 5 February 2017

(4)

Menjadi perlarian di tanah sendiri
Menjadi kedana di laman sendiri
Menjadi rakyat yang miskin
Hidup melarat di rumah sendiri

Gempita suara memecah hening
Sorakan, teriakan menerjah telinga
Di tanah yang kaya kulihat tandus
Di era kemajuan kulihat remaja buta

Saturday, 4 February 2017

(3)

Mungkin itu kebahagiaan yang kau mahukan
Sepi, diam dan halus tenunan kasih
Berbisik-bisik setiap patah bicara
Seperti sahaja menunggu hari dan masa
Berbalas kiriman surat 274km

Mungkin aku terlalu bising
Riuh aku membawa kelemasan
Ketaksempurnaan aku
Melumpuhkan cinta & rasa

Rapi sungguh ego disisip
Tenang kau mengatur langkah
Seperti aku tak pernah wujud
Hebat aturan hidupmu

Jelas sekali
Aku tiada dalam fikiran
Watak aku sperti di angin lalu
Aku datang menemani sunyi
Kau biar aku sendiri
Menyulam sunyi sendiri

Bila ditanyakan keberadaan aku
.
.
Kau terus tenang dlm kepura-puraan
Jernih air turun dari kelopak mata

Kau biarkan aku hanyut dlm arus deras
Yang kau cipta tanpa sebab nyata

Kau bilang pd mereka, aku hilang.

(2)

Hai

Sang perindu yang tabah dan masih tegar menahan rasa, aku tahu kau sudah mengecap bahagia. Eee bestnya! Instead of being jealous, aku gembira. Sumpah!

Aku tenang melihat kau gembira & kau ada tempat utk meluahkan. Hari-hari aku, indah mana pun masih tak aman bila mengenang muka suram kau yang memang tak kena dengan suara ceria kau. Ke mana kau pergi, apa kau buat, aku still nampak awan suram bersama rintik-rintik halus yang meneduhi kau.

Aku dah lama tak jumpa kau, aku tak tahu apa gambaran yang aku dapat terjemah dari luaran indah kau hikhik. Emm boleh aku mengadu?

Aku maybbbbeee tersilap. Tapi aku tak menyesal, sbb kisah kita memang pendek je. Sebab sayang kau melepaskan & sebab sayang yang sama, aku teruskan langkah walaupun aku tahu dihadapan aku ada jurang. Aku tak patah balik carik kau masa aku tersedar, sbb aku rasa cerita kita mmg patut habis kat situ je. Aku tahu kau pun rasa macamtu kan? Bila aku ingat kita; aku boleh lupa kejap luka-luka ni sbb aku rasa macam aku dah selamatkan kau HAHAHA wek. Aku jaga kau mcm kau jaga aku; DULU.

Dah lebih setahun dah sejak kita 1st jumpa. Maybe kau dah tak rasa apa2 bila ternampak aku. Tapi takpe, its okay. Aku still ingat. Atas baaaaaaaaaaaaaaanyak sebab. & maybe sebab hati merasa bahagia. Hati bukan otak. Hati bukan mengingat, menghafal. Tapi dia terasa dengan kehadiran kau. Sejak mata aku terlihat kau & setiap kali mata aku melihat kau; detak hati ni ada irama yang tersendiri, so dia automatic teringat rasa tu. So bukanlah salah aku tau hahahaha.

Teruskan berbahagia & teruslah berjaya mencapai cita-citamu dunia akhirat. Maybe kat sini kita takde jodoh, tempat lain maybe ada hahahahhaha. Mungkin cinta kita abadi disana HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA.

Sebab kita tak tahu apa yang Dia rancangkan utk kita :)

(1)

Sedalam-dalam jiwa
Berparut sepinya luka
Tenang menahan rasa
Gerimis petang,
Bawa duka.

Payah seorang memendam
Bibir tutup dikatup diam
Langit cerah terlihat suram
Terbang dlm pekat malam.